life lesson #2349823975 -- DO NOT TALK AND DON'T NOT TALK TO CRAZY PEOPLE

What I'm about to post probably crosses some kind of ethical boundary, but I'll change the names, and gosh darnit it's my bloggy and I'll post if I want to. (Yes I just said that.)

So there's a big ol' college sporting event coming up, and seeing as how I was on said sport's college team for four years and want to support my former teammates, I thought it would be nice to round up the alumni troops to cheer on the kiddies. I found an old mass email sent out by an alum three years my senior, who shall from here onward be referred to as Psychotic Evil Girl. This was a sport-related blurb about upcoming events PEG had planned, none of which ever transpired, but that's beside the point. What follows is a series of emails, beginning with mine--The Rudest, Most Offensive Email in the History of the Internet:

Hey there, alumni (alumnas?)-

I'm just sending out this little email to remind everyone that [event] is next weekend, specifically Sunday the 9th. I know it would mean a lot to the [athletes] to have as many of us there as possible, and of course it would be awesome to see old friends and meet fellow survivors of the wrath/bad jokes of [our coach <--this is a joke (hee hee) which said coach did not find offensive]. Anyway, it will certainly be an exciting couple of [events], as they're ranked 9th going in and, in my humble opinion and results analysis, could finish significantly higher. So there are several of us in NYC planning to either take a train down or rent a car. If anyone is in the area and either needs a ride or has a ride with space for someone else, please email me and we can coordinate everything. Hope to see you next weekend!

-Gina ([College] '03) [oops, you already know where I went to college...so much for anonymity]

This was followed not five minutes later with two emails from PEG. The first used the same list of addresses to plug the team she currently coaches:

Hi all,

You can also come and see my freshman [compete] at [event]. We have won all but one [event] this season, along with being the BIG EAST Champions.

Go [lesser school]!

Coach PEG

Then an email specially written for yours truly:

Gina,

I would appreciate it if you did not mass email my friends/alumni who dont know you. They are not happy about it. Below are the email addresses that you should take off your list. If you do have some important Alumni information, I can pass it along to them for you. Please respond to this email so I know that you received it.

Thanks,

PEG

I was quite surprised by this harsh, perplexing reaction, and I replied in an equally curt tone:

Ok. [Coach] wanted me to encourage people to come, so I just replied to the old group email. Sorry that an email from a fellow alum is so offensive to people.

Gina

This viscious attack turned PEG into a fire-breathing dragon, and she sent me the following and CC-ed some of her friends, a couple of whom are also my friends:

Well there is a long history of [College sport] prior to your experience that is very negative. Before the [Coach] "era". These alumni keep in touch with me because they are my friends, not because they have fond memories of their team. I have worked too hard to get them involved for you to piss them off.
You should respect that. If your email has even one bit of attitude. You know that I will not hesitate to tell you what I think, so I sure hope that you apologize to me.

Grow up.

[PEG's full name, which I have never heard anyone refer to her as]

At this point, I was stunned, stressed from both this and being robbed the day before (i.e., near tears,) and unsure how to proceed. I forwarded the exchange to one of my best team friends who was very active on the team and knows both of us well. Then, without being asked by me, Best Team Friend sent PEG an email defending my intentions, to which PEG responded pretty much as one could expect:

Hi BTF,

Thank you for the email. I wanted to let you know that I appreciate your thoughts. I trust what you have to say and will leave it at that.

About Gina's email...
Most people, including myself, respond well to emails that start with a "hi___," and end with a signature. If Gina really does regret offending alumni, I don't believe her email would be as short as it was. I do want to let you know that I did not CC you on my email, so I know that means Gina forwarded it to you. I am fine with that. I openly CC who I want and let people know it.

I only responded harshly to Gina's email because I felt it was rude. If she wants to help with Alumni relations, she has to start with expressing herself better over email. And she has to realize that no matter who her friends/teammates may be, she has to respect other alumni especially those who are older. There are 2 reasons why we dont support the team as much as we should. 1) bitter experiences that you guys will never understand and 2) for rude people like Gina, why should we help her out? we need to feel like we are giving back, not being treated like assholes.

Please do relay this message to her and let her know that again, it is childish not to deal with me and to have to cc you to talk to me. But, I prefer to deal with you anyway. I think the both of us can have a working relationship.

About alumni, I know that there are a lot of people interested in [competing] at the [non-college event]. let me know what your ideas may be.

Thanks again,

PEG

I am seriously at a loss. This girl is crazy. I've never been the chirpiest, friendliest person on the planet as I am on the shy side, but I am certainly not planning a team relations sabotage. She's construed some kind of sinister motivation on my part, when my motivation was as simple as "alumni at event = good." All I think I'm guilty of is being ignorant to all this manufactured drama. Getting to PEG's finer points, I've re-read my initial email, and while it may be casual, I included a greeting and conclusion as PEG seems to have forgotten, and I don't see where the extreme rudeness comes in. Also, PEG is hell-bent on calling me childish, yet she uses such tactics as CC-ing her friends and signing her full name. I have not responded to her (how childish of me!) because a.) her attacks against me don't make sense, and b.) because at this point anything I say will most certainly be wildly misinterpreted and used against me. And now that I know my apartment is so break-into-able, I really don't need any enemies. Boy oh boy, I can't wait to see PEG this weekend!