oops!

I don't know what I ate yesterday, but today I had the most raging case of food poisoning. I actually don't think I'd ever had food poisoning before, in spite of my great love for raw seafood, sneaking nibbles of unwashed produce from the grocery store, and the 30 second rule. Also, I never ever puke (unless I've had too much to drink and take a cab home--sorry NYC cab drivers,) and I'm solidly on the Dooce end of the spectrum when it comes to numero dos, so this problem was especially disturbing for me. Moving right along, after visiting the ladies' room four times in an hour, I thought it was safe to go downstairs for my first cigarette of the day. Well, it was not safe. Let's just say that during the seemingly neverending trip back into the building, through security, and up the elevator all I could think about was that infamous Saturday Night Live skit "Oops I Crapped My Pants" which you can view in all it's awesomely disgusting glory here. You're welcome.