Thursday, September 15, 2005

long-winded incoherent nonsensical tales from the last two days

*If You're Kitschy and You Know It Clap Your Hands!
New York is nuts right now, with the CMJ Music Marathon, Fashion Week, and a visit from Bushie all at the same time. The most involved in any of that I'd been was walking past all the black diplomat-type cars on my way to work. But last night, FAB's Former Roommate D came to the rescue and took me as his plus one to the Nouvelle Vague show at the Canal Room. Since he's interning for their record company, we were on "The Band's List" and got to go to the very special OTHER side of the velvet ropes. We also didn't have to pay. We also got to sit in the elevated reserved area in comfy round banquettes while everyone else stood packed like sardines below. (Memo to D: Never leave the music industry! Thanks.) I got to meet D's record company friends, and I made a great first impression by spilling my first drink (vodka and tonic, thank god) all over myself and shattering the glass to bits, one bit of which found it's way into my sandal and cut my toe, recalling the toe-slicing incident at E's place of work earlier in the summer. Fortunately, the band was really, really, REALLY good and I soon forgot about my soggy jeans and bleeding foot.

*Celebrities have been coming on like gang busters lately!
I saw two more in the last two days, and both uptown. I expect to see a C-lister or three when I'm downtown, but outside of work or my apartment it's more surprising. Yesterday morning, after a particularly long and harrowing experience in the photocopy room, I had to ammend my new No Cigarettes During the Day policy and stepped outside for some not-so-fresh air. Who should come sauntering in front of me but Steven Tyler looking scraggly and scary but still somehow cool. He got out of his limo and went through the front entrance of my building all by himself, so I'll forgive him for wearing a man-purse. Then this morning I almost ran over sorta-neighbor Liam Neeson's cute kid as I hurried off to work and Dad Liam walked him to school. Liam kinda smiled at me. I kinda love him.

*It's a Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood.
Speaking of neighbors, I've been having some strange run-ins with those too. It's pretty unheard of for fellow building dwellers to talk to each other in New York, even in smaller buildings ilke mine, so when I get on the elevator and someone else is there, I pretend to be engrossed in my mail, cellphone, the exterminator sign up sheet, etc. When I came home two nights ago I saw a woman I'd never seen before waiting for the elevator to return from the top floor, which means even more awkward silence. Or not.
"Do you live here?" she asked.
"Yep," I said.
"For how long?"
"Two and a half years," I said, thinking maybe she'd just moved in.
"I've been here for eight."
She then informed me that she was off to see the Sigur Ros show at the Beacon, and that I should drop by her apartment sometime. She was cool so I almost would, but am I supposed to bring a homemade pie or something?

Then last night as I was the one heading out for a show, this always jovial 40-something dude got on the elevator with me.
"Hi," he said.
"Hi," I said.
"Nope, but I will be later!"
[puzzled look]
"Get it, I'll be 'hi' later?"
"Aaaahahaha..." move faster you crappy old elevator!

*I'm Getting Married.
Yesterday I got my first marriage proposal. The Canadian and I IM-ed for the first time in ages while I "worked" and he was home hopped up on flu medication. The Big Day is when we're both 32, under the stipulations that we're still single, we haven't gotten too fat, and his overbearing Frenchie-Haitian-Swiss mother is dead so that she doesn't have to witness him marrying an American girl. I'd give this scenario's chances of playing out better than even odds. Cheers!

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