golden girls

As everyone knows, all Asian people look the same. Apparently, so do all blonde women. Since dying my hair blonder one month ago, coworkers, roommates, restaurant patrons, and random barfolk have likened me to the following:

*Julia Stiles, duh
*Lana Turner (I fucking wish)
*Cameron Diaz
*Britney Spears (I'm going to assume pre-Federline so I don't start thinking about killing myself again)
*Helen Hunt
*"someone famous, but I can't think of who"
*Kate Hudson
*and, perhaps most perplexing of all, Christina Aguilera, by a clearly drunk, apparently culturally out of touch, and most likely visually impaired customer

I've been going through an ugly phase lately (by which I mean I look exactly the same as always but feel like Quasimodo) so I'll take it, I guess. Actually, I'm kind of glad I don't look like Lana Turner, because I would probably never stop looking in the mirror and only ever want to fuck myself. Oh wait . . .