Monday, October 01, 2012

sweeping up the cobwebs

Oh hey. I keep meaning to blog and then I don't blog and then I feel bad about myself for not doing what I intend to do, and so then I put it off even more and just hope some magical inspiration will come down from the heavens.

And it totally will.

But until then...

Here are the notes I've emailed to myself for the last few weeks. The bold type is verbatim, the rest is my (probably semi-intoxicated) elaboration.


These are the articles recommended to me by one day when I was on a work computer and TOTALLY CAUGHT UP WITH WORK AND ALL THE PATIENTS WERE SLEEPING:

"1. The Stone: Deluded Individualism [The article begins: "There is a curious passage early in Freud's 'Ego and the Id' where he remarks that the id behaves 'as if' it were unconscious. The phrase is puzzling, but the meaning is clear: the id is the secret driver of our desires, the desires that animate our conscious life, but the ego does not recognize it as such. The ego--what we take to be our conscious, autonomous self--is ignorant to the agency of the id, and sees itself in the driver seat instead."]
. . .
4. Summer Nights: Savoring the Illicit Thrill of a Glass of Something, Outside
. . .
7. The Lede: Handcuffed Man's Death Ruled a Suicide
8. National Briefing: Smithsonian Museum Emptied After Guard's Suicide
. . .
10. Do Argentines Need Therapy? Pull Up a Couch"

The internet is so smart, yo.

pt uses condoms on and off

This was a quote from a doctor's History and Physical note. ("pt" is shorthand for "patient.") I thought the wording was funny. Apparently I am a seventh-grade boy, with a high sensitivity for syntax.

nose grease for pyxis

The machine/robot-thingy that houses/keeps track of our frequently-used medications is called The Pyxis. It requires a username and a fingerprint scan to get into. The fingerprint part never works unless your finger is moist. The fastest way to facilitate finger moistness in an indoor setting under flourescent lighting and artificial air circulation, I have discovered? Nose grease. Moving on.

Some people want to design the building, and some people just want to swing a hammer.

One of my more outspoken coworkers said this during a night-shift conversation about the upcoming national requirement that all Nurse Practitioners get a doctoral degree instead of just a masters degree. This would mean an extra full year of research-based study, and it appears to be motivated by The Nursing Profession's desire to keep up with the Joneses (Physical Therapy now requires a PhD, for example, and also, of course, there's the Medical Doctors).

For most of my life, I thought I wanted to design the building. I was smart and special and good at things and should reach for the stars! And then I went to college and then I graduated and then I got some promising jobs but nothing was sticking. And then I started waiting tables in Upstate New York and I felt happy for the first time in years.

And I realized that designing the building is not about smarts or specialness or talent; it is about motivation. Because I could do something didn't mean I should. Maybe someday I'll want to get a doctorate in nursing but right now I just want to swing the damn hammer.

no Vaseline or anything else that will make her slippery

An update on the nurses' report for a patient that was too out of control to keep in a regular room, so she was penned in the activity room with sheets covering the windows. Sheets were also covering the patient, because she refused to wear clothing and underpants but was okay with wearing sheets in various toga configurations she'd adjust every 15 minutes or so. She was highly aggressive and oppositional and apparently a big fan of lotion and vaseline.


We have a blackboard in the Day Area that is generally used to write the date and any notes the nurse wants to emphasize during Community Meeting or Goals Group. The chalk is left out, so sometimes a patient decides to contribute to the board. "SINKY POOCH" was one patient's contribution, and it stayed up for several days, to my great delight.

arguing with her baby daddy on the phone and not helping me

This is an accusation a patient made about me to another nurse. Note: I neither have a baby daddy nor have ever talked on the phone (for a non-work-related matter) while at work. The patient, on the other hand, spend lots of time arguing with her baby daddy on the phone. I think maybe this is what Freud called "projection"??

Okay, that is all for now! May you design your buildings and/or swing your hammers to your hearts' content.

No comments: